


From Sam's Prespective

by NotGunnaRuPaulogize51500



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2020-07-09 05:49:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19882657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotGunnaRuPaulogize51500/pseuds/NotGunnaRuPaulogize51500
Summary: Everything we didn't see on camera from 'The Society' between Sam and Grizz, and everything we did see, but further in depth from mostly Sam's perspective.This story will change perspectives, so pay attention.Prompt from @jackmulhern on Tumblr!





	From Sam's Prespective

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt from @jackmulhern on Tumblr! 
> 
> I started this several weeks ago, but my computer crashed and all my work got deleted. I owe @Jackmulhern an apology, I've been going through so much and haven't gotten around to this. But he deserves the best for all of his support so... So sorry this has taken so long, I've been in a massive rut, but several five hour energy drinks, a lemon, and a lot of meditation later, I'm finally sitting down and writing this. Thank you for your support and please like, comment, and share! Requests are open!!

***Third Person POV/Grizz's Side****

"She sees in me who I can be, not just the dude I think I am. When someone sees you like that, you want them looking at you forever." Luke said, eyeing the large engagement ring in his hand. 

Grizz glanced down, tears springing forth in his eyes as his emotions welled up inside of him. 'You want them looking at you forever'.... Grizz had longed to feel that way for someone, for god knows how long. But, he had never allowed himself. However, He had nothing holding him back now, not that they had been thrown into this black hole anti-universe. His whole life, a secret had been eating at him, drowning him alive. He felt that he could surpress it until college, to hold it off. But, there was going to be no more college, no more of the future he had dreamed of. All he had now, was New Ham. This new life, and he knew what he wanted to do with it. He knew who he wanted to spend it with. He had his eyes on someone, someone who he could honestly picture having a future with here, he just had to find a way to approach him. 

Grizz had approached Sam Eliot once before, at the prom that Cassandra and Kelly had held, but it hadn't exactly gone to plan. He felt he had insulted him, signing the only word he knew, which was literally 'bullshit' and unconsciously insulting his speech in the process. It had been totally embarrassing. He had given up for awhile after that, focusing on helping Ally and building their new society, but he still found himself watching Sam. He had for years, he had always noticed him. For years, he had noticed the ginger boy, who always seemed so alone, and sad. He would watch as he was bullied and beaten up, but too scared to say anything to him or stand up for him, in fear of the repercussions he would experience. In truth, Sam had been one of the main reasons that Grizz had come to the conclusion that he was gay, noting how he would blush every time Sam caught him staring, or how he would find himself picturing Sam during certain activities. Grizz regretted that, so much now, but all of that was over. High school was over. 

He had a better plan now. 

After The Guard had departed, he made his way to the chapel, making sure Sam wasn't working, before heading to the library. 

***

*Sam's POV, The Following day at the Library*

All morning, I had been stuck here at the library. I had come over an hour before my shift begun, I had a mission in mind. Becca had been having all sorts of trouble with her pregnancy and dealing with the symptoms. She was towards the end of her second trimester, we were assuming. But in all honesty, I don't think Becca truly knew. She had been nauseous, moody, having constant cramps and cravings. Kelly had tried, apparently, to read up on it in the medical books at the hospital, but nothing had been successful. So, I had brought it upon myself to try to find more solutions here at the library. I knew there was a large medical section, so I was determined to help my best friend. I was the father, after all. So it was the least I could do. I was still curious as to who the father was, but I knew better than to ask by now. However, I had my suspicions. It was someone she hooked up with at a party, she had told me. But I couldn't think of anyone she wouldn't want me knowing about, that she would also hook up with, besides maybe one of the jocks. It made since, I hated them, and she would probably not feel proud of it. I knew she would tell me once she was ready, I just hoped she would be ready soon. 

People had begun to question her current state, and I knew she had told Kelly I was the father. Several people knew, and all had doubted that it was me because of the obvious fact that I was gay. But, we came up with a story; We were drunk one night, curious, confused, and one thing lead to another. 

I had gathered over 28 books about pregnancy, trimesters, symptoms, and delivery. The delivery books were some for Kelly, and other's for me to help Becca through the delivery process. As well as one on how to manage the aftermath of birth. We were in way over our heads, but we had no other options. I stood at the copier now, scanning through each book carefully and copying the pages that held the most importance and relevance to what we were dealing with here. I felt the floor boards vibrate, someone had come in the library, but I did't bother to address them. The library had been rather busy lately, people needed recourses and means of entertainment. So, without the internet, they had turned to books. I noticed a hand waving in the corner of my eye. 

Grizz Visser stood there, a backpack slung over his shoulder, and a nervous expression painted on his face. 

I placed the copied page aside and approached him, "What are you doing here?" I asked. I knew he had been busy lately, preparing for this trip to find farmland. SO why was he spending his Tuesday evening at the library? Let alone approaching me. I thought of prom, how he had randomly came and sat down next to me and attempted to talk to me. I felt confused then, just as I did now. 

"Gordie said I could find you in the uh,, the library." He began, setting his book bag down. 

"Oh, well I-" 

"Wait, hold on. Let me just.." He cut me off, holding his hands out in front of him and taking a nervous deep breath. He began making odd hand gestures, occasionally stopping to curse, then continuing. He waved his hands in front of me with a proud expression. 

"Uhh you don't look so impressed." He said, his hands still held out in front of him, as if casting a spell. 

"Am I supposed to understand that?" I ask, signing with one hand and speaking softly. 

"You didn't, well, fuck.."

I raised an eyebrow, crossing my arms for a moment in thought. "What are you doing?" I asked, confused. 

"Trying to speak in gibberish apparently." His face faltered. "I wanted to say, 'How are you, it's good to see you, how do you like my sign language, here." He pulled out a large black book from his bag that read, 'British Sign Language.'

I couldn't hold back my laughter. 

"What? What?" 

I chuckled, pointing towards the book. "This is BSL, I use ASL." I confirm, glancing at him. 

"Oh they're different?" I nodded, "Oh come on man! Its the only book I could find." 

I inquired him, looking him up and down, "Why are you trying to learn sign language? Are you planning on going deaf?" 

"No" Grizz said, sassily, "I'm not. I wanted to be able to talk to you." 

I raised an eyebrow, "I can read lips." 

"I know." He said, his expression changing as he looked down at me, "I wanted to be able to talk to you, you know, in your language." 

I felt my heart skip a beat at his words. "Oh." I let out, smiling at him. "Should'nt you be getting ready for this trip?" I asked. 

A strange expression flashed across Grizz's face. "Yeah, sure. But, I'm also preparing for when I get back." 

His soulful eyes caught my own, making my heart skip a beat again. What the hell was happening? 

"Well, I could teach you, if you want." I offered, suddenly scared of what rejection I might face. 

His eyes lit up, "Yeah, I uh, I'd love that. When are you free?" 

I thought for a moment. "After dinner, usually. If Becca doesn't need anything.." I suddenly thought of Becca, what would she think of this? If, of course, this was what I thought it was. 

"Would tomorrow work? After dinner? I could meet you at your place?" 

I nodded, "Yeah, that'd be good." 

***  
*Third Person POV, Grizz's Side mostly** 

Grizz waited patiently on the sofa at Ally's house. His guard post had been to watch over while Ally rested, she had skipped dinner that night. She had been in a strange place ever since the whole Greg Dewey situation, as had he. Dinner was over in 5 minutes, and so was Grizz's shift, Luke was taking over. Grizz's thumbs fidgeted relentlessly until he heard the front door open, Becca coming inside and grasping her large pregnant stomach. Grizz hadn't put much thought into her pregnancy ever since he had found out she was. He didn't ask, it wasn't his business.

"Hey, Becca." Grizz started, suddenly realizing the time. "Have you seen Sam around?" 

She raised an eyebrow at him, she was recording, as she usually did, trying to document their history in the making. 

"Uhm no, not for awhile I mean." She sat down, her arm resting over her belly. She looked exhausted but still curious as she held the camcorder up at him. "Why, are you teaching him football or something?" She had an amused expression on her face. 

Fuck, he hadn't thought ahead this far. "No, uhm, actually, he's teaching me how to sign a bit." He murmured, instantly regretting asking her about it instead of just waiting. 

"Why are you learning how to sign?" 

Fuck, fuck fuck fuck..... "Well, not much to do around here, you know? Try something new everyday, right?" He prayed to god he sounded convincing enough. 

"Yeah I guess. He'll uh, he should be home soon." 

He sighed, "Alright cool." 

Becca turned off her Camcorder, "I'm exhausted, mind helping me up the stairs? I need to lay down." 

Grizz nodded, "Sure." 

He wrapped an arm around her back, helping her rise to her swollen feet and guided her towards the stairs. With a supportive arm locked behind her as he hunched to the side, he helped her up the stairs and to her bedroom. Sitting her down on the bed, he rose to his full height. 

"Do you uh,, do you need help taking off your shoes or anything?" 

She sighed, looking defeated, "I hate asking, but if you don't mind..." 

Grizz gave her a smile, helping her out of her sneakers and onto the bed gently. 

"If you need anything else, I'll be right downstairs." He informed, giving her a smile which she exchanged, before leaving and closing the door behind him. 

As Grizz descended down the stairs, he noticed Sam on the landing, on his phone. Oblivious to Grizz's presence. He took this moment to take him in; he was wearing his normal, brown jacket, t-shirt, and jeans. His hair was slightly messy, and he looked tired. But Grizz felt he looked stunning, as always. He was snapped out of his trance when Sam turned to him, jumping slightly. 

"You startled me, I didn't see you there. Were you talking to Ally?" 

Grizz felt himself grow red, "Sorry, I uhm, I didn't mean to startle you. And no, I was helping Becca to bed." 

A strange expression crossed over Sam's face. HE was helping Becca? 

"Oh, maybe I should go see if she needs help. She always needs help taking off her shoes." He started, approaching the steps. 

Grizz took to the bottom step, standing in front of Sam. "I already handled it, don't worry." He noticed then how close they were, Sam's eyes on his lips so as to read them. It made Grizz's heart skip a beat and nearly stop. "Shall we begin those sign language lessons? If you're up to it, I mean." He spoke slowly. 

Sam nodded, giving him a small smile and stepping back, "Yeah, sure. Are you okay with doing it on the back patio? It get's crazy down here after dinner." 

Grizz nodded in agreement, trying to ignore the innuendo of 'doing it' and following the shorter boy outside. The fall air was crisp and cool, the porch light providing their only light source. Grizz was grateful for the cold, it calmed the fierce blush of his cheeks. 

He took a seat across from Sam, taking in the sight of him in the dim light. He was memorizing. 

"So, we should start with the basics. Do you know any signs besides curse words?" 

Grizz laughed at Sam's dry humor, embarrassed at the memory, "No, I don't." 

Sam nodded, pursing his lips in thought, "Then we should start with the alphabet. Copy after me." 

Signing was much harder than Grizz had anticipated, the different letters were foreign and unfamiliar in his hands as he shaped his fingers to make each letter. He found it hard to focus on the signing, and not on Sam's eyes. Sam found it hard as well, the dim lighting making Grizz's stern stance turn soft, his chocolate brown eyes seemed almost caramel colored in the yellow light. 

"No, K looks like this, Hold your finger at an angle." Sam instructed, after Grizz had signed 'k' wrong. But, then again, this was all new to Grizz, and K could feel very unnatural, even to Sam. 

Grizz repeated, but he couldn't get his fingers to form the right shape. "Why is this so difficult?" Grizz exclaimed, laughing slightly. 

Sam laughed, "You'll get the hang of it, here let me help." He offered, scooting to the chair beside Grizz. 

Grizz felt his breathing halt as Sam reached over, his hand cupping Grizz's as he manipulated Grizz's fingers into the right shape. Grizz felt as if his skin was on fire, his heart pounding relentlessly as his eyes caught Sam's, unable to breathe. A sudden cold washed over him as Sam pulled away, shuffling back to his seat. 

"There, perfect. Now onto L." 

They continued with the alphabet, repeating it three times. It had grown dark out fully, the moon shining over them and the wind howling through the night. Grizz noticed Sam was shivering slightly, his hands shaking. His jacket was light, and was only wearing a t-shirt underneath. Grizz, however, was wearing a flannel, sweater, and his letterman jacket. He was warm, if anything else. 

"Are you cold?" Grizz asked, suddenly feeling rather bold. 

Sam shrugged, "A little, but I'm fine. I'd go back inside but I'd hate to wake Becca by grabbing my coat." 

They shared a room? 

"Here." Grizz began, shrugging off his Jacket and rising to his feet, Sam watching him with wide eyes, "Take my jacket, I'm warm enough." 

Sam watched as Grizz stood behind him, draping his large letterman jacket over Sam's shoulders, his hands smoothing the fabric down on his arms for a moment, lingering, before abruptly pulling away and returning to his seat. He looked as exasperated as Sam felt. 

"There, now what's next?" 

***

**Lead up to the garden scene, Sam's POV**

I was going nuts, Becca had been trying to strengthen her pelvic core, I think thats what she said, and nearly given me a heart attack, again. Her mood swings had been off the charts, and on top of that, I had been busy at the library the past two days trying to get more information for Gordy and Kelly on birthing and afterbirth. I wanted to explode. It was the thanksgiving dinner today, and I wasn't looking forward to it any longer. The entire day, I had been cooking with Becca, only to have her get angry with me at every little mistake I had made. I loved her, but I was so ready for this pregnancy to be done with. Collapsing on the couch, I pulled out my phone only to discover I had a missed text message from Grizz, five minutes ago. 

From Grizz: Are you busy?

I felt confused, the entire situation was confusing, whatever he and Grizz had going on. 

To Grizz: Not anymore, what's up? 

Buzz buzz. 

From Grizz: Want to come to the garden? I could use an extra pair of hands. 

I glanced at the clock, it was a little past 2:30. Becca had taken a nap at 1:45, and Kelly was coming over here soon. I figured I could for a bit. 

To Grizz: I'll be down there in a bit, on my way now. 

***

**The Garden Scene, Third Person POV, mostly Grizz's side**

Grizz placed his hand nervously over Sam's guiding him. "Grab ahold of the whole vegetable, not just the tip, then twist and pull." He instructed, speaking loudly and clearly, annunciating each word and demonstrating with his opposite hand. 

Sam did as Grizz instructed on his own, putting the Carrot free of its restraint. "wow, that's pretty cool. Should we pull some more? I mean we're missing dinner." 

Grizz shrugged, "I dunno.. I kinda like loosing track of time. It happens a lot down here. They say if you have a garden, and a library , you have everything you need." he thought for a moment, "It's" he signed out the name, "Cicoro, I think." He signed again. 

Sam was impressed, he had been practicing. "Cicoro. Very smart." 

"Well thank you so much." 

The two laughed, while Sam glanced at him inquisitively, biting his lip. "So.. Do you?" 

Grizz cocked his head, "Do I what?" 

"Have all you need?" 

Grizz's eyes flickered with an unreadable emotion. "Almost." 

Sam smiled faltered slightly, licking his lips again. "Let's practice some more, signing I mean. If you want." 

Grizz felt nervous all of a sudden at the idea of spending more alone time with the boy he was already pinning after, but he also felt rather excited by the idea. 

"Sure, it's getting late though, so it's going to get cold." He thought for a moment. "Would you want to come to my house to practice? My housemates will be out at dinner, unless you want to go." 

Sam shrugged, "We still have awhile until dinner, Besides, I like loosing track of time too. Let's go." 

***

**Grizz's Bedroom, Sam's POV***

Our sign language lessons had long since ended, hours passed, and now we were just talking. Getting to know one another. Grizz played Hockey as well as Football, he loved reading, especially plays and poems, and his favorite color was green. Not much to my surprise, he was highly intelligent, a huge bookworm, and appeared to be extremely empathetic and inquisitive. Grizz had asked about me being deaf, saying he remembered how I could hear back in pre-school. He seemed so scared to offend me, but I was happy he even remembered me. I was happy to explain. I had no shame in being deaf, I never have. 

"Meningitis, wow." Grizz said, taking a deep breath. His eyes were swimming with emotions I couldn't fathom. 

We were sat side by side on the edge of Grizz's large bed, I was turned to face him, him slightly tuned to me. 

"Do you remember? Remember hearing at all?" 

"Some." I reply, thinking for a moment. "I remember my mom's voice, the way she used to sing to me and Campbell. My dad's laugh." I smiled to myself at the memory. "When I dream, I still dream with sound, but not new sounds." 

Grizz's watery eyes caught my gaze, "What would be a new sound?" 

His lips were harder to read than most, but by now I had accommodated to them. He would sign the few words he knew, I appreciated that. more than words could explain. 

"My voice. I remember my voice when I was younger, But im guessing it's a little deeper now." I say, earning a laugh from Grizz. My mouth moved before I could think, "I wish I could hear yours." I confessed. 

Grizz smiled slightly, before his face faltered, his eyes growing watery again with that unfathomable expression on his face. I watched as he took a deep breath. 

"Could you teach me, uhm, one more phrase in sign language?" he asked, looking down. 

I nodded for him to continue, my eyes searching his own, longing to know what was going on in that head of his. 

"How do you say, 'kiss me'?" He asked, his mouth hardly moving. 

I prayed to god I had read his lips right, his eyes refused to meet mine, as if afraid I might reject him. But, how could I? His words made my heart stop, and my breathing get caught in my throat, as I found my body reacting before I could even think. I leaned in, searching his face for any sign of dismissal, and cupped his cheeks in my hands, letting my eyes fall to his lips. I stood dormant for a moment, waiting for him to pull away, reject me. But he didn't, I could feel the ghost of his breath over my lips and I let my eyes falter shut, closing the gap between us. 

My lips molded against Grizz's, kissing him hesitantly for a moment, before I felt him kiss me back, igniting this spark inside of me that flooded through my veins and surged my impulse further as I kissed him again, more feverishly. That time, he didn't hesitate to kiss me back that time. Our lips moved in perfect synch, as if they were meant to kiss each other. I couldn't think, my head was a complete blur, consumed in only the thought of the boy I was kissing. My heart was pounding and the temperature in the room seemed to rise as I felt Grizz's hand rest on my thigh. My fingers laced through his thick brown locks as I pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. My tongue darted over Grizz's bottom lip, nipping at it. I could feel a guttural moan scape from the back of my throat as he sank his teeth into my lip, tugging on it seductivly. All of my blood rushed south, and I felt myself growing harder as I kissed him back with an unfathomable amount of passion, unable to hold myself back any longer, and he kissed me back with just as much vigor. 

I shifted slightly, tugging on Grizz for him to follow me down onto the bed as I tried laying back, only to have Grizz stumble, his body toppling over mine onto the bed, causing our lips to separate as we laughed. 

"That was very graceful." I commented, smiling up at him. 

He was shaking, shaking horribly. He was nervous, but laughed nonetheless, "Shut up." He said, smiling down at me as he leaned down again, kissing me. 

Grizz's lips were like silk; slick and delicate against my own. He was straddling my hips, his large form looming over me beautifully. I let my hands wonder his clothed chest, sinking lower and lower until they met the hem of his shirt. He allowed me to let my fingers drift beneath his sweater, I could feel him shiver and quake at my soft touch. His kisses grew more feverishly as I touched his bare flesh, my whole body feeling alive and on fire as his kisses sunk lower and lower, nipping and sucking at the exposed skin of my neck, a moan escaping my lips. I was grateful we were alone in that moment, his housemates gone at dinner, because I couldn't hear myself, and I quite frankly could care less if I was being loud. Grizz's barely-there kisses traveled back up to my lips, pecking them before he stopped, causing my eyes to snap open. 

His chocolate brown eyes now appeared black in their lust blown state. I could feel his whole body shaking above me. "Do you want to keep going?" He asked, his lips barely readable through his heavy breathing. 

I didn't hesitate, "Only if you do." 

His eyes flickered away from my gaze. "I just uhm... Fuck." he abruptly got off of my lap, sitting away from me and covering his face in his large hands. 

I crawled to his side, placing a hand tentatively on his shoulder. "Grizz? What's wrong?" I asked. 

He sat up, his hands dropping and his eyes finally meeting my own. "It's just.. I've never.. You know.. With a guy before. I don't want to do anything wrong." He looked scared in that moment. 

I smiled slightly, rubbing soothing circles along his back. "We can stop, if you want to, but if you want to keep going, I can take the lead. If you want me to." My eyes searched for him, he seemed so distant. 

Grizz smiled slightly, "Okay." he said nodding, "Just, talk me through this. I want you." 

I didn't hesitate to kiss him, pushing him down gently onto his back, his head hitting the pillows as I climbed on his lap. Our lips never separating. Grizz kissed me back roughly, unable to hold back any longer and he seemed prepared to drown himself in me. I responded almost immediately, parting my lips so Grizz could nip, suck, and lick at my lips with a blissful ease. I could feel Grizz's relentless heartbeat against my own chest as he clutched I clutched face; his fingernails drawing teasing patterns by my ears and down my neck neck, tugging at my loose curls roughly. Griping my waist tight, Grizz grind his hips up into my groin, I could feel his moan vibrate against my own lips. It trickled down my spine and tickled that dangerous spot between my hips, and so I kissed him harder.   
He flipped us around so he was hovering over me. 

Teeth, lips, and tongues clashed as we grew more frantic; as if making up for lost time. Grizz drug his teeth against my bottom lip, down my chin, and then to my throat. My back dangerously arched, I could feel Grizz's pulse drumming against my chest as his as he nipped greedily at my flesh, causing me to release a sigh.

The tension that had been long brewing was getting the best of the both of us, my hands clutching Grizz's shirt as Grizz continued dipping lower and lower.

Grizz stopped for a moment, seemingly breathing me in, gazing down at me with dark, lust blown eyes. 

"Are you sure?" He panted, annunciating his words.

I smirked, looking up into Grizz's dark eyes, "I know you want to touch me just as I want to touch you. I'm more than sure."

I wasn't sure where my sudden boldness came from, but I could tell Grizz didn't mind the words by the sudden pressure against my upper hip.

Grizz's sigh of surrender tickled my tonsils as he latched onto my mouth; finding that Grizz tasted of unspoken promises tonight. It was Intoxicating even. The lustful twitch in my stomach came back to life as Grizz groped at my skin with all of the frustration he had in him. Grizz clutched at my hips, holding me firmly in place, seeming determined for me not to move, as if he was as scared as I was that one of us might let go, might leave. 

While my menstruations were slightly timid, there was no hesitation, and I successfully matched Grizz's passion with a beautiful pace that left Grizz feeling light headed. I laced My fingers through Grizz's thick brown locks again, giving them a firm tug to bring him closer, but I swear to god he wasn't close enough. That bold impulse came back to me as I dragged my hand down Grizz's torso and tugged at the seam of his shirt. My finger tips grazed across his skin as I shifted the material up, making the taller boy sigh against my lips. Grizz broke their heated kiss to help, roughly yanking his shirt over his head and tossing it aside, lost somewhere on the floor.

I took the stolen seconds let my eyes wonder over Grizz's naked skin. He was a hypnotizing shade of moonlight; broad and yet lean, beautifully sculpted with curves that were just begging to be touched. Every inch of him seemed to be carved by some heavenly creature, I could feel myself grow hard again at the sight of him. HE was here, with me, this didn't seem real. 

I barely managed a sigh of admiration until Grizz was kissing ne again, frantic and sloppy, but I could care less. I needed this. We both needed this. We needed to be close.

The room's light was extremely dark, save the knowing glow of the tenaciously dim lamp near the bed, I was grateful for this, feeling insecure in the presence of the beautiful boy above me. But, as Grizz glided his hands across my shoulders, I felt some of my tension slip away enough for him to reach down and begin unbuttoning my shirt. Grizz tossed my shirt aside, and I found myself sighing at the feeling of his hands on my exposed chest. Grizz's fingers drifted to my jeans, swiftly unbuttoning them, the fabric falling loose, exposing my boxers. 

I pulled back and to the side to give Grizz a meaningful look, the anxiety creeping up on me as Grizz's eyes drifted up and down my exposed chest. 

My unease became impossible to hide as I shifted his arms to cover myself out of habit. Grizz quickly captured my lips again, to erasing any sliver of doubt in my mind. 

"You're beautiful." Grizz signed, before kissing me again. 

He shifted his hand between our bodies to unfasten his own jeans, maneuvering them down his legs, and kicking them away. I felt his heart thundering against my chest, threatening to bust through my rib cage and burst free. 

Grizz pushed me back down onto the bed, as gently as his need would allow, and crawled over my body again, still kissing me with great passion.

I felt the nervous seize of my muscles again as he reached down to palm at my erection. Grizz deepened the kiss to distract me, as I was pleading to any entity that would listen that my anxieties insecurities would drift away, as would Grizz's. 

I let my hands wonder his form again, drinking in and memorizing his form with only my fingertips as we kissed. I could feel his shaking subside, as had mine, and his movements became more determined. 

He grazed his teeth across the bumps of my collarbone and I relished the moan that escaped his lips and ghosts over my own, I could feel the vibrations. He was slowly relaxing, I could feel it. I could feel his desire pressed against my inner thigh as he tentatively rubbed circles along my hip bones, sliding his hand between us, searching my eyes. 

I lifted his hips as Grizz tugged my pants down slightly to allow him better access. I let out a gasp as I felt Grizz's fingers wrap around my length tentatively. Gently stroking me, finally circling the base of my length in the shape of an o. His fingers stroked me inquisitively, causing me to nearly scream at the much needed friction.

"Is this okay?" Grizz asked, looking up at me. 

I nodded, perhaps too eagerly before letting my eyes close shut. 

Then, there was this blissful wet warmth enveloping me, and I dropped my head back against the pillow, a guttural moan escaping from my windpipe, my eyes shut tightly. I could feel the pad of Grizz's tongue licking my tip, like damp silk, and the grope of his lips dragging over me. All of my blood rushed to my groin as I nearly came undone at the sensation. All i could seem to focus on was the wet and soft feel of Grizz drowning me.

Grizz's movements were by no means confident, but god they were skilled, but I swear to god that his inconfidence made it all even more intense. Every lick of his tongue, and every pull of his mouth felt delicate and smooth, like it was more the kiss of his breath folded around my erection than actual physical contact. When Grizz did something between a blow and a sucking motion, I nearly lost control. Grizz's throat closed around my length, it felt immaculate and Devine, I wasn't sure if it was from the years without a release or if it was just because it was Grizz doing this to me. But I was dangerously close. I was Unable to take anymore.

"Fuck, Grizz." I panted, tugging on his hair. 

His gaze met mine, "You okay? Was that good?" 

I laughed, "Yes, more than good. I'm going to cum way too quick if you keep doing that." 

He slowly began to slid his hands down my thigh with medal award winning patience. I could feel myself vibrating with anticipation and I glanced down to see Grizz bathed in the soft dim lighting, watching me with hooded eyes. He drifted up and lowered his waist between my thighs, trying to kiss me again before I placed my hand on his chest and stopped him.

"Grizz wait." I murmured. "Please go slow."

Grizz raised an eyebrow, "I thought you-"

I shook his head. Grizz's eyes went wide. 

"I haven't either. I'll go slow." 

I realized just how much I was willingly giving him then, and how much he was giving me, and I found it hard not to be affected by it. The lusty throbs in my chest aches for a moment with something else; something painfully pleasant that made me decide not to be selfish tonight.

leaning over to the bedside table, Grizz reached into the bedside drawer, holding up the condoms and lubricant. I felt my heart skip a nervous beat and my cock twitch at the sight. He coated his fingers in the sticky substance, setting the bottle to the side with the condoms.

"I'll need to get you ready" he spoke slowly, making sure I understood, "Hold onto my shoulders and if it hurts, breathe and grip them as tight as you need to, bite my lip even, okay? Let me know if it's too much, I don't want to hurt you."

I nodded, biting my lip.

Grizz's words seemed to rather sooth my qualms, and I gave him a nod of assent before craining my neck to steal a calming kiss. Grizz instantly intensified it, as his fingers ghosted over my stomach before dipping between his thighs to prepare me. My body felt as if it were on fire, and I loved every minute of it. 

He ran his finger over my entrance slowly, causing my breathing to hitch, allowing the lubrication to make me keen before slowly pushing his slicked up finger inside of me, pain consumed me as I found myself gripping his shoulders for dear life before I remembered Grizz's words, gripping his shoulders again and letting out a shaky breath against his lips. He moved his finger slowly, in and out, curling it before slowly adding another, waiting for me to relax around him, as I did, he began sissoring his index and middle finger inside of me, kissing me deeper and more feverishly until I felt his fingers brush against my most sensitive spot, causing me to let out a moan. 

"Fuck..." I breathed, "Grizz. I need you, now, I'm ready."

He had done all he could to relax me. I watched as He tore the condom packet open and wrapped it around his own length. Grizz was large, and the thought of something of that size being inside me both excited and intimidated me. 

Grizz positioned himself appropriately, and I instinctively trapped his bottom lip between my teeth. Grizz stroked his length soothingly a few times before slowly pushing himself in, finally entering me. Pain, unfamiliar, foreign pain consumed me. I kept reminding myself to breath. I gritted my teeth and let out a hiss as Grizz sunk deeper into me. 

Separating the kiss Grizz caught my gaze as he reminded "breathe, baby. Relax. It's okay."

I knew I needed to accommodate him, and Girzz remained still, resting his forehead against my own as I took deep breaths. He reached down with one hand, the other holding the headboard, and stroked my length soothingly, peppering reassuring kisses along my forehead and cheeks. Carefully easing out, then filling me again, he repeated his painfully slow movements until my fingers released his shoulders slightly, my hisses and winces turning to whines, and then pants. My pain ebbed and quickly turned to pleasure. He dipped his head to the crook of my neck, teasing me there as he quickened his rhythm.

I lost concentration as his pain ebbed, and he felt my pants grow heavy as Grizz's thrusts stirred something inside of me. Every stroke seeming to flicker against the foreign sensation behind my navel that I knew was my prostate. I instinctively rithed my hips in order to get deeper, I needed Grizz to be deeper.

"Grizz, deeper please." I panted out.

Grizz lifted his head to hover his lips over my own; barely touching as his vilotal breaths filled my mouth and violated my tongue. Our gazes locked. 

"I'm not hurting you, am I?" He panted. 

I shook my head, "No, far from it, just please, I need more. 

I watched as Grizz lifted my thighs, pressing them back against my chest, and pushed into me further This new angle causing us both to let out audaciously loud moans as my walls pulled Grizz in, engulfing him in warmth. Filling me up. 

Pulling out, then pushing back in, Grizz picked up his speed, and I began feeling that familiar heat in my groin. I knew that I wasn't going to last much longer, but I'd be damned if I didn't feel Grizz unravel inside of me. I gasped as Grizz reached down and began stroking me, suddenly feeling overstimulated in the best possible way. 

"Fuck! Grizz. Right there." I cried as I felt Grizz press right against my prostate again, my hands grasping the sheets, my knuckles were probably turning white I was grasping them so tightly. 

Grizz pounded into me relentlessly. I finally let out a stuttering cry as pulsating heat spread throughout my core and ribbons of white splattered against Grizz's stomach and the his fists. I was seeing stars. Grizz's control was lost as he shuddered gracelessly and allowed the bizzare but beautiful sensations to consume himself as well, it seemed. Grizz clutched me tightly as he came undone, With a few more twists of his hips, Grizz's head fell back before looking down into my eyes, his jaw slack as I felt him release inside of me. Grizz collapsed against my chest, and I held him close, running soothing circles against his skin as he breathed heavily, I was breathless myself.


End file.
